Contemplative Bible Reading

Proverbs 25:21-22 (New International Version 2011)

²¹ If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat;
if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.
²² In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head,
and the LORD will reward you.

This proverb is quoted in the New Testament in Romans 12. That chapter in Romans is about change – changing my mind and my life as a response to Christ. I believe that these verses are telling us how to respond to an angry person.

Try this theory:

Angry people are angry because they are hurting in some way.

A young Christian woman once told me about an experience she had while entering a church building for a worship service. An older woman scowled at the young woman and spit the words, “women should wear dresses to church, not pants.”

The young woman was frightened and shrunk away into a corner of the worship center. That is a “normal” response to an attack – flight. Another normal response to an attack is to return the attack – fight.

How about the water-like-burning-coals response:

The older woman was frightened by a young woman dressing in a way that was unusual. The unusual is often uncomfortable, and the uncomfortable often brings hurt, which often brings anger and the spiteful words the older woman used.

A water-to-drink response would have been for the young woman to step close to the older woman, draw near, appear vulnerable, smile, and say something like, “I love the clothes you are wearing today. They fit you so well and the colors match your complexion.”

Meet anger with kindness; meet the enemy with a drink of water.